A British Adventure

In this post, I have compiled all my British slang into a story. See if you can translate!

At about half-eight, I walked into form.  Suddenly, one of my mates said, "Oh no, you have some crumbs on your jumper!" It must have been from my crumpet this morning.
What a kerfufle! I hurriedly brushed them into the bin so I wouldn't look like a chav.  Then, I looked around for Miss.  She wasn't there, and there wasn't a cover, so a few students decided to go bunking off. Another group of students who stayed turned on the telly, but all that was on was adverts. Some of the A-star students were revising for their GCSE's. I checked my timetable.  All I had was maths for first period, so after form was over, I went down the corridor to my classroom. 
I sat down and pulled out my excersise book.  Maths class was intense.  For our daily revision, we calculated the area of a trapesium.  After that was sorted, we moved on to the bit where we check our homework. We practised some indices and surds for a while, and then we moved on to calculating the gradient of a line.
"Okay, so what would be the gradient of a horizontal line?" Asked the teacher.
"Wouldn't it be naught?" I answered.
"That's correct!" she said, and wrote it on the board.  But despite my correct answer, the teacher set twenty problems for homework!
When the bell rang, the teacher called me over. 
"I just wanted to tell you that you got an A-star on your mocks! See you tomorrow!"
"That's brilliant! Cheers, Miss!" I said, and left for my second hour class, which passed uneventfully. After second period, we had our morning break.
Some students went to go queue at the canteen, but I just grabbed a snack from my locker and went straight to the dining hall. I got out a carton of squash and some biscuits to eat.  One of my mates started ranting about how they raised the price of chips to two quid and forty p. I agreed that it was a ridiculous price, and went to go throw my rubbish in the bin.  I stopped by the water closet to wash my hands, and then went to my third class.
It was just RE, so my mates and I didn't really pay attention, and spent the whole time putting my hair in plaits. The next class was PE, so I ran and got my kit out of my locker.  I quickly put on my trainers for class. We were playing football outside, so I also put on some tracksuit trousers and a jumper.
After PE and lunch, we had future skills class, where we talked about applying for the Sixth Form.
Finally, it was the end of the day! I went up to Town Centre to do a bit of shopping, then met some of my mates at the cinema to see the latest film. I went home for dinner, where my mum had prepared yorkshire pudding with pulses on the side. I finished the washing up, and went to bed at around half nine. Cheerio! :)

To Review or to Revise, That is the Question

Teacher:           Alright, first we're going to revise what we did last lesson.
           Me:                  What was wrong with it?
           Student:             Huh?
           Me:                   If we're revising something, then did the teacher teach it wrong or what?
Teacher:           Okay, just do these math problems quickly and try to remember the formulas for
                         area, because you will need to know these for your exams.
           Me:                  Oh, you mean we're just reviewing.
           Student:            No, we're revising.
           Me:                  ?????
Teacher:           Alright, Elizabeth, here's your copy of the revision guide.
           Me:                  ((looks through book))  So this is just like a study guide?
           Student:            Um, I think so maybe? What's that?
           Me:                  Oh nevermind. 

While in the U.S., "review" and "revise" have very different meanings, the two words both mean "review" here, which confused me quite a bit my first week.  However, I soon discovered that reviewing and revising are not quite interchangeable. After an interesting ceminar on 'revision' techniques, I believe I have discovered the proper British connotations of review and revise.  Here's what I've learned:

Revising implies active studying.  It includes basic reviewing of the material along with re-learning the things you have forgotten.  A common revision strategy includes making charts and jotting down notes to go over all the information.  If you revise a topic, you go into depth with it, with a strong focus on that one topic including all the details. Revising is a process, (like studying) and takes considerable time and effort.  A good revising strategy also includes some reviewing (see below), but it is much more than that.

Reviewing is often a part of revising, but this term isn't used very much.  "Review" implies quick and cursory, like a five minute glance over your notes, while "revise" implies a process of detailed reading, writing, diagramming, flash-card-ing, and other study strategies.  After you have successfully revised, it is useful to go back and review for 2-3 minutes a day to keep the material fresh. 

After a week of confusion, and then another week of confusing my American friends by saying things like "I'm going to go revise my chemistry notes now,"  I think I finally have it figured out.  Revision for GCSE's will be a lot easier now that I know what the term means! A-Stars, here I come!

Look Both Ways

Approach the crosswalk.  Left, right, left.  No wait.  Right, left, right. No wait.  Its a one-way street! I think?  Welcome to London, a labrynth of majestic buildings towering over narrow streets that intersect at odd angles.  Sometimes one-way streets even have a median in the center, only both sides of the median have cars travelling in the same direction.  They were put there purposefully by parliament to confuse pedestrians.

However, it appears as though the British government has taken some pity on ignorant tourists (like myself) and therefore painted either "look left" or "look right" on the brink of the major crosswalks, to keep us civilians from falling victim to the wild taxi drivers who don't seem to understand red lights.  However, in the event of a random blank crosswalk, my small family of Americans gets lost in the crowd of j-walkers and cars that just don't want to stop.  And at 10:00 at night with one contact missing (my brother's fault!), the middle of a street looking the wrong direction was not exactly the place I wanted to be.  After a close call with a red-light runner that ended with me diving off the street and straight into a curb, I think in the future I will just take the tube.

Despite my near-death experience with crazy London drivers, the remainder of the exursion was truly an adventure.  We spend hours upon hours in the British Musem, where we saw the Egyptian Book of the Dead, a collection of mystical spells and drawings depicting ancient Egyptian procedures for ensuring a pleasant afterlife.  We also experienced ancient Rome, Greece, Mesopotamia, Nubia, Midieval Europe, and a whole array of different cultures, their entire existance preserved in their tools, art, and writings.  It is truly amazing that the fragil papyrus drawings of the Egyptians have survived all this time.

Painting a picture in my mind of these ancient civilizations, people just like us lived and walked, made art and made war, ate crude meals while moving from place to place, and sat down for huge festivals with exotic items imported via camel from the far reaches of the world they knew.  The sun was once controlled by gods, and life and death were merely temporary states.  Once, a soul could be saved by a certain type of Grecian urn.  The existance of the gods was indesputable and magic existed in the cycles of the sun and the stars, the harvest of crops, the gift of life, and the mystery of death. 

So what is our magic, the sparkle that lives in our society, that will someday be looked upon with awe and wonder?  Will future civilizations decode our writing and find beauty, or will they just find a shopping list?  Will they see our scientific theories as blind faith, or the stepping stones to the future?  Is the world we know 'flat' compared to that of future civilizations? Perhaps someday, a piece of your life will be on display in a museum somewhere, and people will marvel over the complexity of our civilization. Or perhaps, a piece of crude graffiti will survive, and people will turn up their noses at our uncivilized vulgarity. Or maybe both will survive, and future anthropologists will know us better than we know ourselves.

So take a moment, as you cross the streets of time, and look both ways.  Look backward, and learn all you can about the people who once walked this earth, paving the way for our innovations, and look ahead to the discoveries that can be made in our lifetimes, and in the wider future.  Look left right, then look right left.  As soon as I figure out this left-side-of-the-road stuff, the street will be safe to cross, and then I will truly be on the 'other side of the pond,' or perhaps even the other side of time.

13 Things You Need to Know About the British School System

1. Uniforms. 
2. You are not required to go to school if you are over 16 years old.
3. There is no "kindergarten." The age group that we put in kindergarten go to "Year 1."
4. After Year 11 (which corresponds to our sophomore year of high school), students go to the Sixth Form College, which is sort of like a pre-college.  Real college (like to get a degree) is only three years long in Britain.
5. School goes on all year round, with a only month of summer break but tons of random week-long breaks throughout the year.
6. The school you go to is based on merit, not proximity. All the schools are clustered together in one square, and all public schools have competitive admission.
7. GCSE (General Certificate of Secondary Education) are courses similar to AP classes in the U.S.  It is a standardized curriculum with a huge test at the end.  However, all students are required to take GCSE courses.  Exams aren't just one test per class either - they are ongoing assessments througout the class, and can consist of things like lab experiments and field work as well.
8. Every school in Britain is given a rating based on student's exams. 
9. If a school is rated too poorly, the government will take it over, fire all the teachers, remodle the building, change the name of the school, and change the school uniform.  (This is not an exaggeration at all - it happened to a school in my city just this year.)
10. Classes aren't chosen - you are assigned classes to take based on test scores.
11. Everyone takes gym. Every year. No wonder the Brits are so thin!
12. The principle is called the "Head Teacher."  "Houses" are a real thing too - similar to teams in some middle schools in the U.S.
13. Yes, they walk on the left side of the hallway.

The Castle in my Backyard

Warning:  this is not your average sandcastle.

Colchester Castle, perched on the hill behind my house, is built on the ruins of Rome and contains the entire history of England within its walls.  After an excursion to the museum inside, I will attempt to summarize the history of Colchester in a single blog post.  Wish me luck!

Girl Power

Colchester was once comprised of several tribal nations, all under the control of Rome.  However, one northern tribe, the Trinovantes, manage to avoid being conquered by making several deals with the Romans.  The King of the Trinovantes agreed to give the Romans part of the Trinovantes treasure if the Romans agreed to stay out of his kingdom. Then, the King died and all hell broke loose. The Romans demanded all the treasure, and when the Queen Boudicca and her daughters refused, the Romans beat them, raped them, and took the treasure anyway.  The Queen Boudicca then gathered an army and led them against the Romans.  She burned the Roman temple (and everyone inside) and proceeded to slaughter all the Romans in her path.  Boudicca drove the Romans out of Colchester, and proceeded to battle the Romans all throughout England! 

[However, once she was defeated, the Romans reconquered the area... but details, details, she was still awesome!]

Boudicca is still remembered today as a symbol of women's power! Let this be a lesson to you:  never mess with a woman's jewels. ;)

Castle Number One

In 1076, Duke William of Normandy ordered several castles to be built throughout the country after he conquered most of England.  All the remaining Roman ruins in the area were broken down to make brick for the castle.  Colchester Castle was built right on the foundation of the Roman Temple that Boudicca burned.  The castle was hastily built to protect from invasion...which never actually came.  The castle remained armed and ready, however, and was built up to four stories tall.

Rebellion!

In 1216, the castle was besieged for three months straight when King John broke his agreement with the rebellious nobles (the Magna Carta - sound familiar?)  The Royalists were stuck in the castle with little food and water while the Parliamentarians brought in hundreds of troops who stood outside the castle battering the walls day and night.  In the end, King John won and conquered the castle.

The Ironmonger Scandal

In the 1600's, the castle fell out of use and became the local ruin.  John Wheeley, a poor ironmonger, partially demolished the castle and tried to sell the stones.  He also dug a hole deep into the castle's foundation, searching for burried treasure.  He never found any, and the castle stones didn't sell very well, so he abandoned the castle before it was completely destroyed.



The Perfect Gift

In 1726, the castle (now a complete ruin) was given to Charles Gray, a prominent member of Parliament, as a wedding present! Even though the castle was mostly a wreck, it was still a castle (hint, hint) which is a pretty awesome present if anyone needs ideas (hint, hint). :P

Castle Number Two: Interior Decoration

Charles Gray began to restore and alter the castle. He added a tiled roof, the great dome, a study, a library, arches, and enlarged windows, plus decorative bricks on the walls. 

Museum

Now the castle is a museum, with a functional roof, heating/plumbing, and random midieval artifacts.  We toured the dungeons, the turrets, and the largest staircase of any castle in England! I pass by the castle every day on my way into town, and remember all the history that lurks in my backyard. :)

Things I Should Have Included in my School Application

1.  I am only 110 pounds.
2.  I am only 5 feet, 3 inches tall.
3.  I will bring my own pencils.
4.  I will bring my own paper. 
5.  I legitimately like learning.
6.  I am fairly well-educated already.
7.  I know how to use the metric system.
8.  I like using the metric system.
9.  I don't like McDonald's.
10.  I appreciate British history.
11.  I will bring my own desk.
12.  I will bring my own food.
13.  I will bring my own water.
13.  I will bring my own tissues.
14.  I will bring my own trash can.
15.  I will bring my own oxygen if I have to!

I am not a stupid American, and I don't take up very much space.  How can you possibly not have room for me?!